Update

I haven't been on here in awhile.  It has been SUCH a tough couple weeks for me.  I finally got all the divorce paperwork and parenting plan filed.  I had to drive out to Dallas to give the papers to the sheriff to serve C because he lives in Polk county.  I could have had someone do it for free, but it was worth it to me to pay and not have to get anyone involved in the nastiness. 
I gave them the paperwork on the 23rd and they said they thought it would be delivered on Monday.  I gave C a heads-up about it so he didn't have a heart attack when the sheriff came knockin on his door.  Last thing I need right now is to be dragged into some sort of stand off/hostage situation.
As of today he hasn't told me whether he got them or not.  I have a pretty strong feeling that he isn't going to talk to me about them and will probably stuff them in a drawer and pretend they don't exist.  This is what he's done in the past with bills or any other unpleasantness he doesn't want to deal with.  If he doesn't reply within 30 days, I automatically get whatever I asked for in the papers. 
Initially when I was trying to figure out what I should ask for for child support and medical support, I was taking into account the differences in our incomes.  I make a pretty good living, he is on unemployment.  I started out saying I would pay 80% of medical bills and he would pay 20%.  I also asked for the minimum amount of child support.  I am so thankful I had a meeting with The Duke before I took the papers in to be reviewed.  He said I absolutely needed to ask for more child support, and that it is C's responsibility to contribute half of Savannah's expenses.  He said everything should be 50/50 as far as paying for her health insurance, co-pays, daycare...  He also strongly suggested I start looking into putting her into a day care and not have C watch her all day.  I had told him how the outside of the house had gotten TRASHED.  Cigarette butts, old newspapers, toys, water logged clothes, bikes, rotten lumber, more cigarette butts, you name it, it was on the lawn.  It looked especially heinous when compared with the lawns of our neighbors that are professionally landscaped weekly.  I also told him about one of the dogs being completely neglected.  Every time I went over there, Quincy was either tied up in the garage, forced to sleep in his own poop or shivering and soaked on the back deck.  Meanwhile, the favored dog is inside curled up on a chair.  It made me SO upset.  I am still pushing C to take Quincy to the Humane Society.  Even if they put him down, it is still better than the life he's living at the house. 
After hearing about the declining situation at the house, The Duke said those were warning signs and that it wasn't a healthy environment for Savannah. 
I didn't mention my talk to C, but  a few days later when I went by the house, the outside was completely cleaned up!  The walkway was pressure washed, the cigarette butts were gone, the bikes were in the garage, and the boards were neatly stacked.  Such a strange coincidence, but by then I had had time to think about The Duke's suggestion. 
I know how hard/impossible it is to get stuff done when Savannah is hanging on my leg.  I imagine it's the same for C.  I think it's a good idea for him to take this time to go to his doctor and mental health counselor, get stuff done around the house, do some job hunting, and maybe even take some classes at the local community college and start exploring other career fields that aren't so hard on his body. 
I think it would also be beneficial to Savannah to have other kids her age to play with and socialize.  When I bring her home each night I feel so sorry for her  because she has no one to play with.  I'm it.  And I don't always have a lot of energy for putting on a one man show.  I want her to be comfortable around other kids and to learn to share. 
The only thing left to do is figure out a way to broach it to C so that he doesn't get offended and fight it.  I think his first reaction is going to be to think I am insulting him and his parenting. 
I think he needs the kick out of his comfort zone so that he starts preparing for the time when he has to move out of the house and pay rent.
Right now I am going to look for a place to take Savannah 3 days a week, C would have her 1 day (unless he finds a job...I'll be more than happy to adjust) and I would have her on my Thursdays off. 
I have a little more freedom now financially.  I was initially going to add her onto my health insurance at work.  Guess how much that would be (keeping in mind there is a $1000 deductible)...$426 a MONTH.  Can you believe that ridiculousness???  Today I started looking around at how much private health insurance would be.  You aren't going to believe the difference.  I priced it with Providence, Blue Cross, and ODS and they were all pretty similar to each other in price and coverage.  For the very best program they offer (also with a $1000 deductible) it is $125 a month.  For the same coverage. What is wrong with this picture?  Why the discrepancy???  I am so glad I looked around instead of just signing her up.  I decided to go with ODS after calling her doctor's office (she is a naturopath) and hearing that they have had a really good record working with ODS.  I turned the application in today and should be hearing back within 2 weeks.  Hopefully sooner.  That is a huge weight off my mind.
I think I am going to encourage C to get a divorce from Alex's mom and file for child support from her.  That way he will have the cash to get Alex covered with health insurance.  Plus it will finally clear up the mess that is his marriage history.  Will it happen?  Probably not.  But for Alex' sake I hope he is open to the idea.  It's about time her mom pitched in instead of leaving it up to the other women C brings into her life to take care of her.
I have an appointment on the 6th to talk to the VA Psych and get back on Prozac.  I don't think it's a good sign when you start praying for an accident that will put you in a coma and force someone else to take care of things.  Not good at all.   Especially when you are completely serious about it.  It got to the point where I thought to myself, What's the big deal about life?  It's not so great.  In fact, it kind of sucks. 
It seems like I am psychologically on a downward trend and I would like to catch it before I get to the point of being suicidal.
I hope you all had a great Christmas.  I, personally, am just glad I survived it and that it's over.  Things HAVE to start improving soon, right???